My Night of Hell

My night of hell started when I decided that to be able to afford to stay in education, and maintain my alcohol problem, I would need a job.

My second mistake that night, was deciding that I didn't want to stack shelves or work on a checkout, as I've seen the zombies that do that job and they scare me.

My third mistake, was thinking that bar work would be entertaining, give me ample time to chat up drunk girls, and provide hours that I could work my education around.

My fourth and ultimately worst mistake, was applying for bar work at a hotel.

Personally, I quite like hotels. I like that all the food is cooked for you. I like that the room gets cleaned for you. I like that they have a 24 hour bar (the 'good' ones anyway). I like that everyone's really polite to me. I like that I can get a sandwich at any time of the night.

I do not however, like being on the other side of the hotel. Dealing with chefs who are rude and treat serving staff like dirt. Explaining to a guest that we're moving them to a different room because the housekeeping staff are too stupid to realise that the previous occupant wet the bed (they're also foreign so can't understand when you try and tell them). Being polite to a guest no matter how rude they're being to me. Making five sandwiches at 4am because after 11pm, the only staff in the hotel are myself and the night manager, and he's having a coffee.

The most tedious aspect of working in a hotel bar, in comparison to a regular bar, has to be mystery guests. I can be rude to normal guests after a certain hour because, I don't care. Chances are they're being rude to me, and unless I do something exceptional, the night manager will take my side. The reason for this is that after a certain hour, the guests are drunk, there are only two staff left working in the hotel, and we don't need the hassle. I cannot do this with mystery guests.

Mystery guests take notes on everything. They're given checklists which cover how I served them, my attitude towards them, my appearance, my professionalism, my product knowledge. Whilst the night manager may be on a poor salary, and worked ungodly hours for so long he's become a bitter shell of a human being, the operations and general manager work 9-5, and they're the ones who are given the mystery guest report.

When mystery guests are in the hotel every member of staff works twice as hard, because if we don't, the respective line manager will lay into us for the rest of the week. I get home at 2am, tired, stressed, hungry, and in no mood to talk to anyone for at least a week. The act of being polite for 8 hours straight is the hardest of all.

Then I wake up at 8am to go to university.

Mystery Guests, I hate you.