My Job Description, and My Job Reality

I've found that the job I signed up for is not the job I actually perform. My 'Job Description' is a somewhat limiting ideal, whereas the reality is a tacked on mess of additional jobs that weren't described to me at all.


Job Description

1) To cater to guests and non-residents in the bar and lounge area, providing both food, drink and table service up to the hour of 11pm, where service will cease for non-residents.


Job Reality

1) Serve drunken idiots up to 11pm, then argue with drunken idiots and expel a third of them.

2) Provide room service when the waiter assigned to room service has disappeared mysteriously.

3) Recite the wine list to guests over the phone, as reception cannot pronounce half of them.

(After 11pm)

4) Take over catering functions in the kitchen, providing simple food for guests.

5) Provide directions over the phone to guests travelling to the hotel, as the receptionists don't drive and have no sense of direction.

6) Take over maintenance functions throughout the hotel, as the maintenance man has left and most guests can't work out how to get the radiators/air conditioners/internet/toilets/showers to work.

7) Provide a 'carry-to-room' service for guests unable to find their way on their own.

8) Clean away any vomit left by guests on the steps of the hotel.